Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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