I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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