All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
