And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
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