If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
50% drunk capacity currently
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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