awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize