her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
