I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
