Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
