he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
