Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
