It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
