Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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