I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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