they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
