So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
The uberlube is also flammable
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
