If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
