And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
