the day after is always just damage control
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
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