So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
