I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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