All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I need moral support for this bender
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Randomize
