Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Randomize
