shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
