how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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