Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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