dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
