my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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