they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
