Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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