I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
My vagina is very pro this idea
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
