I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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