If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
