I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
