Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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