you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
