just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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