Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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