Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
