the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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