operation have a gay friend backfired
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
