i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
