so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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