We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
