i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
