at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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