ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
