Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
