Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
