Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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