I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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